Introduction

The year 2025 sucked. On so many levels. I started this newsletter the same way as my last because it's still relevant. 2025 brought me a lot of hard knocks as far as my writing. I had some harsh betas. I parted ways with my agent. My acceptances for short stories slowed down to a crawl. I'm back querying. All in all, it's been a hell of a year as far as external validation is concerned. A kick in the gut that's slashed my confidence into tatters.

Crisis of confidence

It's not too much of an overstatement to say I've been in crisis, artistically speaking. And the problem is that confidence is such a huge part of writing. You need to be able to sit in front of a computer or notebook and believe that the words you are putting down matter. That you can articulate what you want to say. That you are good enough, whatever that means. A lack of confidence leads not only to burnout and avoidance, but it makes for bad art. You stop taking risks. You stop being yourself.

Everything takes forever

As I was thinking about confidence and writing, I realized that, for me, the most important problem is that writing for traditional publication is a protracted wait. Most of the validation of your artistic process has to come from you, because tangible successes (e.g. offers, publication, good reviews) come so sparingly and happen so infrequently that they are not dependable sources of either confidence or motivation. But that's really damn hard when you're in my place, a querying author at the beginning of the road.

Believing in the “yet"

That brings me to my thesis. The most important part of maintaining confidence as a writer is believing in the “yet.” What do I mean by that? It's the ability to say, “I'm not published…yet. I haven't hit the NYT list…yet. I don't have a book deal…yet.” Apply it to whatver stage you're at; it doesn't matter. The point is, “yet" is hope. “Yet” is the belief that you can still succeed. I'll never suggest excessive positivity--that success may never happen, of course--but if you have the option of believing in “never" or “yet” and you're still working hard and you still want to try, it's more helpful and hopeful to believe in the “yet.”

So how do we get there?

That's the hardest part, the one I'm still figuring out. One thing I look at is the past. I've had moment where I've believed that I'd never be published. Now I have a dozen or so short stories under my belt. It's not a novel, but it's a damn sight more than nothing. If I'd believed in “never" back then, I might have quit. Another thing I do is learn. I read craft books. I read other books. I try to level up my skills. If I'm always improving, then hopefully I'm increasing not only my chance at publication, but also my confidence in my own abilities to articulate my ideas in the way I want.

In conclusion

I don't have hard and fast answers. This path is different for everyone. All I ask is that, if you are feeling hopeless about your writing, you consider: what will help you believe in your “yet”?

Thanks for reading! What some ways you increase your confidence in your art, of whatever kind?

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But wait! There’s more!

C.J.’s Corner

Get to know me and what I’m up to. Read it all or skip to your favorite section. (Links work only in web version.)

I’m writing | I’m reading | I’m watching | I’m listening | I’m playing | I’m doing 

I’m writing:

Watch this space. Things are moving…slowly.

• I'm still querying my adult contemporary horror novel, And the Dark Will Know My Name. For a full pitch, check out the new section of my website.

• The Enter Here anthology has been released! We finally got our physical copies in and are almost ready to ship them out to Kickstarter supporters. Didn't do the Kickstarter? No worries. Get it here! If you are a reviewer with a site or booktok or whatnot and would like a free review copy, contact us at enterhereanthology(at)gmail(dot)com.

• I have been in burnout mode for months but, as of January 18, I'm working through a 100 words a day plan to get myself back into writing. I'll be writing Miracle Girl, a contemporary horror novel about a woman possessed by her dead sister and a defrocked priest with nothing to lose. I hope to draft it in a couple months and then get to revisions and expanding!

• I did cheat and write a couple of flash pieces. Hopefully those will find a home somewhere.

• My story “The Creeping" was reprinted in the December issue of Penumbric Speculative Magazine. Read it for free here!

I’m reading:

I'm working on reading one thing at a time. I know, how weird.

I finished:

This Wretched Valley by Jenny Kiefer. Remind me never to camp in the middle of the wilderness. This is a gruesome, gory survival horror tale about a few adults trying to check out a new climbing rock, only they get way more than they bargained for in the way of ghosts and other supernatural haunts. It was a weirdly comforting read. Just what I needed at the time.

I’m watching:

I'm mostly watching lots of football. Go Bears! I'm ready for them to go all the way.

I haven't watched many movies this year or any at all really, but I'm making my short list, and I really want to finally watch Cronenberg's Crash and The Fly especially. I also got a recommendation for Strange Harvest.

I’m listening:

My writer friend Lex Duncan got me into Spiritbox and Ice Nine Kills. I've been listening to INK's Welcome to Horrorwood album, which is full of homages to Psycho, Child's Play, and other horror classics. Metalcore is my new jam.

I’m playing:

My video game brain is so dead. I need someone to give me like a week of free time to play BG3.

I’m doing:

More crochet! I have been working on a lion plushie for a friend's kid.

I've also been doing a lot of art. I'm working on hair. If you want to check out more of my art, you can look at my Cara portfolio.

That’s all for now!

If you like my words, don’t forget to subscribe!