Queries seem to be a mystery when you first start writing them. There are dozens of writers who have posted about how to write a query letter (agents too!) but I guess I’m going to be one of them. I’m not the expert. I just have a successful query letter and I’ve also critiqued a lot of other query letters and seen the same mistakes repeated.

So consider this a how-to guide to get you started.

C.J.’s query

Here’s the query that got me my agent (minus the part about how she liked my pitch in #PitDark, which I put up at the very top). Read it first and then we’ll discuss.

Is it perfect? No. But it worked. Let’s talk about why.

The metadata

There’s a lot of talk about whether you should put your metadata (stats, comps, etc.) up front or at the end. I polled some agents and most preferred up front, so that’s what I do. Let’s break it down.

You’ll notice I don’t have room for personalization. One, that’s because this is a generic query. Two, that’s because personalization is sort of pointless unless you can point to something and say THIS is why you’ll like my book. A specific MSWL item. A tweet they wrote. Something. Just saying “because you like fantasy” is implied.

Start with your book. Please don’t say “complete at xxx words.” It had better be complete, hadn’t it? Just say it’s a xxx-word novel/novella/whatever. So TITLE is a xxx-word AGE GROUP GENRE novel. Don’t get too cutesy with the genre. Stick to the ones you see on Barnes & Noble shelves. You can describe more later.

Now we want comp (comparative) titles. These should be recent (published within the last 1-3 years) and they should be in your age range AND genre. Mine are a little bendy because I’m writing dark fantasy so I used one horror comp and one fantasy comp. And since I had two solid adult comps, I also threw in a very short extra one: a movie that really fits. Your extra can be anything. A video game. A song. But limit yourself at three. You don’t need a litany of comp titles.

Last is the extra stuff. I thought it was important to note that Dolls is sapphic. It’s a selling point. It’s big representation. And it’s not obvious from my synopsis. Don’t get too wordy here, but add anything you think might be important. Nothing to add? That’s okay. It’s not necessary.

The synopsis

I think I’m going to write a whole actual post on how to write a good synopsis, because it’s hard as hell. But for now, let’s look at this one and what components it has.

Hey look, colors! Let’s break it down.

In orange/yellow, we have the hook. Not every query includes this, but I think it’s useful. It’s a one sentence hook that captures the attention and basically sums up your entire premise.

In red, we have the set-up. You need to introduce your principal characters, their wants/desires at the outset of the book, and what they hope will happen. You can also thread in a little worldbuilding. Here, I talk about my carnival, because it’s going to be very important.

The next paragraph is the turn. The “but.” What happens that changes everything and makes the hero take a different path?

Then in the next paragraph in blue, we have the time pressure. The ticking clock. The heroes are taking action and they’re discovering things that change what they want/desire and what they hope to accomplish.

Last paragraph, the bad guys close in. The heroes learn something that changes everything. And, MOST IMPORTANTLY, in green we have the stakes. 90% of queries I’ve critiqued are missing this part and it’s arguably the most crucial. What does the hero have to do, and what bad thing will happen if they don’t do it?

The bio

Finally, we have a bio. This doesn’t have to be long. It’s the “get to know you” piece. Do you have any marginalizations you want to share? (You absolutely do NOT have to share them. However, many agents are looking to rep marginalized voices or #ownvoices, so it’s something to consider). You also want to put any writing credits you have already, as well as any pre-formed audiences you may have.

The salutation

Don’t forget to say thank you. I did a couple times and I felt shitty about it.

You might also consider including any Content Warnings. Many agents appreciate, and some even request, CWs now.

The query

And that’s it! Ta da! You’ve written a whole query!

There are lots more resources around the web. Mine is not the ONE TRUE VERSION. It’s just what worked for me.

If you have a query that needs help, I critique them for $15 US. You can get in touch with me at cjlistro (at) gmail (dot) com with the subject QUERY CRITIQUE. 

Thanks for listening!